Confessions of a fat girl….part 2

Published August 2, 2012 by meganbiddle

Yep, still fat.  I was just checking.  I keep taking pictures of myself to see if I can see the difference that 22 pounds makes.  Nope, sure don’t.  I’m still fat.  There is a little difference though.  I am a fat girl who is doing something about it.  I have not had some scary moment at the doctor’s office where I was informed I must lose weight or else, and frankly I would like to keep it that way.  When you grow up at a fat kid, having self-esteem is hard, even as adult.  No, I’m not fishing for compliments or for everyone on facebook to tell me how beautiful I am inside and out.  I am just working on me for once in my life.  I am calling it project me.  Catchy right?

What is involved in project me?  Well, I am so glad you asked.  This is about being self absorbed for just a bit.  It is about believing I beautiful.  It is about taking care of myself.  Basically, continuing to do the things I have already been doing but with a positive attitude.  Positive attitude, now that is difficult, but I am working on it.  Day by day, moment by moment, trying to breathe.  Trying to be stronger.  Trying to have faith in myself.

I have been doing well with my eating.  If I feel the need to binge or emotional eat, the frozen fruit is still doing it for me.  My big splurge is my iced coffee and string cheese.  Thought I met my match with the elliptical earlier this week, but I have it now!  In all my years of gym going, it is the one thing I have avoided.  Hopefully my weight loss continues to stay on track and I can see the difference, but as I mentioned before, once a fat girl, always a fat girl.  We are our own worse enemies.  A lot of this is a head game, and I have played it before.  Only this time I win!  I am determined to do so.

-22 and counting!

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